Thursday, March 7, 2013

let's talk hair...

Hair?  Really?

For the last three years, this blog has been about grieving over the loss of hair,
and in this family, we do everything we can to downplay hair,
so now it's time to talk about it?

Is this a joke?

Coming from the white girl who has a head full of stick-straight hair
and wouldn't know what to do with curly hair to save her life.
Plus she has a daughter with no hair at all!

What does a gal like me know about doing my black son's hair??

Not a THING, really.


Which is why I've been reading up pretty extensively on the subject, because at least to me, it feels somewhat like learning a foreign language.  I'm terrified I'm gonna mess it up!  I mean, the last thing the poor kid needs is for his hair to look like his white mama doesn't have a clue, right?  :)

So I'm learning.

This child is doomed, if I do say so myself.  I don't have girl's hair to play with or style.  So sorry, bud.  You're it.  Your hair is gonna get played with and fussed over.  It's just the way it's gonna be for you.  And it's kinda fun for me.

So we're starting young.

I've read that these little finger coils are cute on little boys, and they are supposed to be protective to the hair as well.  I know, I know.  He barely has any hair to begin with.  But I figured it wouldn't hurt him to start learning to sit and get used to the feeling of having his hair done.

And I think it's a cute change!  Especially since his hair is getting so patchy in the back and sides from where he naps, this style helps it all look a little more tight to his head, so the balding spots aren't quite as noticeable when he's wearing it this way.  (though right now, it only stays this way for about a day or so)

Apparently, in general, the more curly hair is, the less often you should wash it.
Straight hair like mine makes too much oil and needs daily washing.
(I couldn't imagine skipping a day without shampooing-- I'd be a grease ball!)

But curly hair like his doesn't produce oil easily,
so the challenge is keeping it moisturized and conditioned.
So we're washing his hair about once a week.
And only using conditioner.  (called "co-washing"- weird, huh?)

I've learned a TON about it from this blog.

I'm still learning what types of products work best on his hair, and just when I get it "figured" out, his hair will change on me, I'm sure.  The problem I'm having now is-- his hair looks good after I spray a mixture of water, detangler/leave-in conditioner, & oil in it, but then, only a few hours later, it appears dry and frizzy all over again.

Obviously, any advice you all have is more than welcome.

The second time I tried the finger coils (last week), it must have been super relaxing because in the middle of it, he fell fast asleep.

I don't blame him... wish i could do this when I get my hair done!

You can see here how the twists are more pronounced while the hair is wet...

... but they shrink down closer to his head once his hair dries.

Isn't he the sweetest little thing?

Cute little guy, no matter what his hair looks like!

Certainly HE doesn't care!

If there's one thing we say in this family, it's that you don't need hair to be beautiful.

So leave me alone, woman!  :)
Posted by Picasa


  1. Hi Amy! Angie led me to your blog. Congratulations on your little boy!!
    We just adopted a little girl about a month ago. She's a precious little thing, and just like you- I'm at a loss about her hair! I love that website too and I'm trying to learn all I can before our daughter actually needs me to do anything to her hair... so I don't have any tips yet! :) Except that you're right... a friend just told me that I probably shouldn't worry about her hair much right now, because she'll probably have different hair texture in a few months anyways!


    by the way... your kids are so adorable!!

  2. I got suggestions from my roommate for his hair. I'm doing my best to summarize her wisdom since I really don't know anything about this!

    She recommends that every time you wash his hair with conditioner, you should also use gel and coconut oil. She said the coconut oil will help seal the conditioner in his hair. Then she recommends using a water and glycerine/oil mixture to spray his hair twice a week.

    I hope that helps!!

  3. It sounds like you may already be doing most of that though, so I'm not sure if any of that is new information for you.

    Oh! and be encouraged...when my roommate read your comment about the "co-washing," her comment was that you had really done your research!!

  4. Hi Amy! Catching up on your blog tonight and LOVE the hair post :) I am all over ChocolateHairVanillaCare, too! Harper has SO much hair so I am doing more of her 1-2 year hair routine. I'm combing it with tons of conditioner during baths, using Organic Coconut Oil after cowashing, and then applying the product Shea Moisture Coconut and Hibiscus Curl and Style Milk after that...all on wet hair. Daily, between baths, I am wetting it using water in my hands then applying more Shea Moisture Style Milk. Love that stuff. It smells great, weighs down the curl, and keeps the frizz at bay for a good while (sometimes all day) on her hair (without being "crunchy"). It may work for you! Here's the link from Target