toil...

I was emotionally and physically exhausted on the drive home alone late last night.

After a long day of strenuous manual labor on our 1820 house that amounted to us completing absolutely NOTHING except causing more future work for ourselves, I quickly had to jump into musician mode with a 4 1/2 hour rehearsal for an outdoor production I'm playing this weekend.

And after factoring in a sinus infection that just won't go away and the backyard Bible club I helped lead this week, I was just struck with such an overwhelming sense of how toilsome and chaotic life feels right now.

I couldn't help but ask God out loud, "Why does nothing ever seem EASY, God?  Why must life always be full of toil and tension?"  (I love that we have a God who invites His children to come and complain to him.  [see the Psalms])

In the "befores" and "afters," I guess I'm just ready to skip right along to the "after" part.

 When you're in the middle of a home renovation and trying to be a mom to two young, spirited kids who are both home and needing from you constantly, life feels unusually unbalanced and overwhelming.   

Frustrations run high.  

Lots of opportunities to apologize and forgive are created.

But amid all the current toil, I'm looking back at the simplicity and peace we had just a few short weeks ago at the beach, when the only thing we had to do was enjoy ourselves and make memories together.  

Ahhh, how I'm longing for that again!

I'm remembering how sweet it was to watch Jameson gain the courage to take the first step in wave riding: throwing down his board into the water and hopping on just like daddy does when he rides onto the shore.

Caroline's now an old pro

wave riders

I'm remembering the joy of playfulness.

 I'm remembering how magical it was to capture the unbelievable moment we saw dolphins jumping FROM THE SHORE, as if they were giving us our own show.

During all the struggle and toil and sawdust and fleas it helps to look back and know it won't always feel this way.  Happier, more peaceful days are truly ahead...